Don’t Fall For the Same Old New Year’s Hype

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Happy New Year! The “New Year, New You” energy is in the air! And with it comes a lot of pressure to hurry up and get moving. We are all familiar with the concept of setting resolutions each year, in the form of new health and fitness goals, bad habits to break or new careers to pursue. But we don’t have to fall for the same old New Year’s hype. There is a different way to ease into a fresh year. What if this time could be about slowing down, reflection, and rest? 

New Year’s Hype History

In my history research, I discovered ancient Babylonians are said to be the first people to set New Year’s resolutions, around 4,000 years ago. They celebrated the new year when crops were planted in mid-March, not January. Unfortunately, centuries later, Julius Caesar reformed the calendar and established January 1 would be the beginning of the new year. Now this date on the calendar, falling immediately after a hectic season of shopping, decorating, traveling, etc is synonymous with setting goals and stressing about the changes you must pursue. Do you see the recipe for disaster here?

new years hype

Why Do We Still Set New Year’s Resolutions?

For many people the new year is a time to reflect, set health goals and carve out a list of vague resolutions. Yet, despite the best of intentions, only a fraction succeed in keeping up with the new plan. New Year’s resolution stats kinda blew my mind. Millions of people set New Year’s resolutions every year, and less than 8% of people actually stick to them. Why do we continue setting them year after year? They border on daunting. Looking forward is terrifying and challenging. So why do millions of Americans still fall for the same old New Year’s hype? … It’s because we’re hopeful.

What’s Better Than The Hype?

Whenever you happen to read this post, whether it be January, or any other month of the year, I hope you understand the inherent strength and value that lies inside you. You see, I’m not against self development or transformation, in fact, it’s one of my favorite trial and error journeys. What’s better than the New Year’s hype is a gentler, slower, easier process. I declared war on New Year’s resolutions a long time ago and I want to share why common resolutions fail. YOU don’t fail, the resolutions do.

Winter Is For Rest and Reflection

January 1 is the beginning of winter in the western hemisphere. Running out the door to start a new exercise regimen, or promising yourself you’ll lose 20 pounds when the clock strikes midnight, doesn’t respect our season. What does benefit your mind-body-soul connection, is taking the time to sit still and reflect. With busy schedules and hectic lives we cannot expect to keep up without giving in to the need for rest.

Winter is the time of year to reflect on our health, replenish our energy and conserve our strength. Winter is when the natural world slows down and the days are darker. In Traditional Chinese Medicine (TCM) winter is related to the water element. I think of water as slow, tranquil, quiet and fluid. Nature depends on the calm and peaceful season of winter to rest, storing energy and preparing for spring.

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Lunar Intentions

Instead of following the New Year’s hype, use the moon cycle to plan for the year. Using the moon is a great way to tune into your desires and passions. There are eight moon phases throughout the month, and each comes with it’s waxing and waning levels of energy. Imagine how powerful it would be if we set intentions and desires every month. A natural, harmonizing way to hold ourselves accountable and frequently check in on progress.

Every 28 days or so, the moon makes her way around us, glowing in cycles of the sun’s illuminations. Each phase of the moon is better suited to promoting different activities. Simply put, we can get more done and feel better by being more in sync with the lunar schedule.

The cycle begins and ends with the New Moon. During this phase, energy levels have been depleted. Use it to rest, reflect and plan for the next month. As the moon waxes, you gain energy, take action and gain motivation toward your goal. The Full Moon is when your energy is at it’s peak, then it slowly wanes back to a New Moon and begins again.

Photo by Mark Tegethoff on Unsplash

REAL Goals vs SMART Goals

SMART goals are specific, measurable, achievable, relevant and time-bound. That sounds good, right? It makes a goal sound achievable, like the acronym says it will be. The problem is, YOU are a human. You’re not a growth projection, but a person with a complex life and constantly shifting priorities. When we use SMART goals, we tend to focus hard on the specific and time-bound parts. Therefore, if we don’t hit our specific, measurable goal within the time-frame, it’s deemed a failure.

I don’t know about you, but I’ve never been able to just output goals on a timeline. I’m not a robot, my energy levels fluctuate, excitement about the goal changes, you know…life happens. Instead I put REAL goals into action. REAL goals are relevant, experimental, aspirational and learning-based. REAL goals focus on development. They lead you to take actions that are uncomfortable and awkward. That’s what we’re really looking for!

Life is messy. Nothing is ever perfect, and the challenges we overcome in the process are worth more than achieving a target objective. REAL goals allow you to build knowledge and character. They push you into areas of personal difficulty with compassion. Yes, your goals should be measurable and specific…but do they fit realistically into your life? Does it make you feel excited and energized to work toward the result? Are you able to adjust if something happens that changes your priorities?

new years hype

Setting Intentions

Instead of setting goals or resolutions, I’ve noticed a big shift in recent years toward choosing a New Year’s theme or intention. I love this idea! And because less than 8% of folks stick to their resolutions, everyone usually sets the same ones year after year. Save more money. Lose more weight. Stop drinking alcohol. Setting intentions takes the pressure off achievement and puts it on growth, comfort, and permission to be yourself.

Tips Moving Forward

Before you start jotting down a list of intentions or themes for 2023, I want you to ask yourself some of these questions:

  • What life have you waited to live?
  • Who do you want to become?
  • What haven’t you seen that you wanted to?
  • What joy have you been putting off because your fear is paralyzing?

We are constantly paralyzed by fear. Stop allowing yourself to put off joy because the fear of change is greater than the fear of misery. And I’m not talking about massive, life-altering intentions. These can and should be small, bite-size changes. This is why I love the idea of lunar intentions. It is possible to set intentions and alter them from month to month, or start a completely new one when the next month rolls around.

People who are doing the things you want to do are not smarter than you; they just set intentions and move out of analysis paralysis. I’ve been stuck in analysis paralysis more times than I can count.

If you want to be a writer, make it a habit to write every day.

If you want to have a solid morning routine, get out of bed when the alarm goes off.

If you want to be more organized, declutter a drawer, your email, a closet, etc.

If you want to go on a vacation, simplify your budget and save little by little.

If you want to be a runner, start a daily running ritual.

If you want to make healthier choices, buy more produce, drink less alcohol, make wellness appointments and keep them.

Lead With Love

We have been falling for the same old New Year’s hype for a long time. This is your signal to go slow, ease into it. Remove the shame. You’re not looking to fix yourself or gain someone’s approval. The old you has survived a lot. Let love be the force to guide you. Operate out of love for yourself, not judgment or punishment. When you love yourself, you wish it goodness. Change will happen when you understand what you want and acknowledge what you truly deserve. New beginnings don’t just happen on January 1st, they happen every morning you open your eyes.

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